As a single parent of two boys and a girl, I was faced with endless challenges surrounding their teenage years. Sibling rivalry, schedules, supervision and chores top the list but are, by no means, the end of the list. Sound familiar?
The foundation for those years is strongest when established from early childhood. Those little things that are so cute when a two year old is involved are not usually so cute when said by a 14 year old. Behaviors of a three year old are not the behaviors we want from our 16 year old. Nobody wants to believe that their adorable toddler will ever turn into THAT kind of teenager, yet some of them do. Why? How?
Being a free spirit and extremely laid back parent is wonderful for your toddler. Providing your child with all of the advantages life has to offer, including the “stuff”, is awesome for any age that your child is. Take the attitude and the stuff and fast forward to age 16. Your child now thinks that respect is “old fashioned” and is given to his or her heroes…the anarchists and other rebels that also think respect is old fashioned. Parents also need to be aware that “stuff” only becomes more and more expensive and must be provided in greater and greater quantities. Habits are formed early on in life, as are expectations. So when you are teaching your sweet toddler, picture for a moment the same scenario with your teenager.
We hate the selfishness of many of today’s teenagers and the illusion of entitlement that so many seem to wear like a badge of honor. We want to be respected as parents and we want peace of mind when they are unsupervised. We dread one of those phone calls from the school principal or the police. We do not want to have to work a second job or extra hours just to buy more stuff that will keep your teen from a temper tantrum or major blow out.
What are the answers, when all we really want to be is great parents providing our children with the things we may or may not have had? How do we strike that balance? In an upcoming series of blogs we will look at these questions and explore some solutions. In the meantime, if you are having dealing with a pre teen or a teenager and you are ready for help, contact UnLeash the KNOW to start a program for your family.
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